every once in a while, I became upset about nothing,
I am generally tired, which is a understatement,
hubby needs his naps and gets his naps regardless,
I don't think I'm used to this SAHM thing, just quite yet.
my 2 beautiful children, I adore them, they are my soul, a large potion of it,
just that
I'm still deeply unsatisfied.
for some strange yet reasons, I love old people movies, eg, 'Another Year', 'Lies and Secrets', 'Its complicated', and 'Hope Spring'. The latter strike me somewhat a while ago, how similar some aspect it compared to my marriage.
I'm really not complaining, my husband cares for me enough, he helps out enough, he loves our children, he's decent enough.... but he's just enough, really.
I honestly donno what more I want out of him, yet somehow I just want more.
Its starting to remind me of Eat Pray Love.
I am lonely, I know it, it doesn't surprised me, but it's hardly entirely his fault therefore neither his responsibility to maintain my happiness.
I'm just unhappy that whenever I try to explain to his, he gave me such response, like fearing to be blamed, or fear to having to do something, he usually says, do you need to go to the hospital... no he's not trying to be funny.
It's entirely my own problem, I just wish, like in dealing with my loneliness, wish there's someone I can share this feeling with, yes who with?
And I truly don't have the time to go for a walk, or to get drunk, or even go for a holiday.
God help me.
After a few days I will be fine, i know it, I just wish all this upsetting was progressing towards something, like my humanity would increase...? It's a shame and a waste it generate nothing ...
